Linger
by eviscerate
Summary: the desires of dreams are completely separate from the desires of reality. heine/naoto. might be continued.
1. part one

to be honest, this started as an excuse to write pseudo-smut. i really don't know when i'll be updating this, or if i really will at all. i'll just leave it as 'incomplete' for now, until i get a good idea of how to continue.

this is rated M just to be safe, since i might include more mature scenarios later on that don't just happen in a dream.

i hope you enjoy it regardless.

* * *

linger | part one  
heine/naoto.  
safe +  
word count 750+

* * *

Cold fingers traced her nearly-bare hips, making her shiver in delight. Those bony hands knew exactly where she was most sensitive, damn them. The fact that just one touch from him made her react like this drove her crazy. Why couldn't she be stronger? Why did she let her guard down around him like this?

Despite these thoughts, she couldn't help but smile against his firm kiss, and he must have noticed. He began kissing harder, exploring her mouth with his lips as his fingers explored a little further south. They were getting dangerously close now, and the anticipation was killing her.

She felt her back touch the cold stone wall, and realized that he had her cornered once again. Again she chastised herself for allowing this to happen, but as soon as the thought came, it vanished when his hand found its way beneath her thin cotton underwear.

She let out a very uncharacteristic whimper against his lips as she pressed harder against him, feeling his smirk. Her hands moved up from the back of his neck into his hair, pulling and stroking the messy white mane, making him growl.

The cold against her back was becoming very apparent now, creeping up and down her spine, up through her neck and down her backside. His fingers were moving so slowly now, every inch closer to where she wanted them seeming like miles. He moved his lips away from her mouth, down to her collarbone where he kissed and sucked in _just the right places_ to make her breath stop and her fingers curl. She couldn't take much more of this.

She gasped as she felt a cold jolt of pleasure below her waist, suddenly realizing that his hand had reached...

...

Her eyes fluttered open.

In the darkness she could make out the ceiling fan above her bed, slowly rotating, making a quiet whirring noise. She stared at it for a while, completely numb. She could feel the sweat that had formed on her skin, and the heat that radiated off of her whole body. She pulled the sheets off to cool herself down, and was made aware of that familiar, embarrassing dampness in her crotch area.

She sat up and drew her knees up to her chin, face in her hands. _That dream again._

It had started a few weeks ago. The first dream had been very simple. It consisted of him merely kissing her, catching her by surprise when they passed each other on the street. He grasped her arm, pulled her close, and gently planted his lips on hers. She had brushed it off the first time as some bizarre projection from a movie she'd watched recently.

But it only got worse. Every time she had the dream he would become bolder, all the way from using his tongue to removing her skirt. The location had changed as well, from out in broad daylight to in a dark alleyway at night.

She hated it. Going to sleep was becoming a dreaded task, and she would deliberately stay awake for much longer than she should, to avoid confronting the feelings she experienced while dreaming. It was unfamiliar, confusing, and frustrating. She shouldn't be concerned with that kind of thing, not when she had more important matters to attend to - and she most definitely shouldn't be thinking of _him_ that way. He didn't even like women, aside from Nill. He couldn't even touch her, much less...

As the thought occurred to her, a lump formed in her throat. She shook it off, closing her eyes. She couldn't believe what she had just felt - was it _disappointment_?

No, she thought. It was just the aftermath of her dream. She didn't want him. She had never wanted him. Dreams were just dreams - completely separate from reality. That projection had just been magnified by her imagination. Her dreams must have been getting boring, so they used the first projection and ran with it. He was probably just the first man to come to mind - she didn't know many, after all. It was just coincidence.

She rubbed her eyes, still tired but very much awake, and glanced at her clock. It wasn't a decent time to get up yet, so she lay back down on the bed. She slowly pulled the sheets back over her and sighed.

It was hard to get back to sleep after a dream like that. She lay awake for some time, staring at the ceiling and trying to keep her mind as blank as possible.

But as much she wanted to forget it, the feeling of cool lips against her neck still lingered, jarring her thoughts and preventing her from getting any more sleep.


	2. part two

hey look, it's this thing from two years ago!  
i'm not sure when i decided this was worth continuing, but i actually have ~ideas~ for it! this is another insomnia-driven bit of fic from me, so i hope this part isn't too awful wrt grammar and such. i also think the weakest aspect of my writing is dialogue (and shoujo clichés) and this is full of it. :/ hope you enjoy regardless.

* * *

linger | part two  
heine/naoto.  
safe  
word count 1100+

* * *

The cold winter wind rushed through the door of Liza's shop, while the tiny bell above it chimed. Heine, seated in the booth closest, pulled the collar of his coat tighter as he felt the chill. He didn't bother glancing at the entrance, as he was just there to spend some time with Nill. The young girl was working part-time at the shop lately, both learning to sew and acting as a live model.

"Naoto! It's been a while, dear!"

Heine looked up in surprise when he heard Liza's greeting. Indeed it was Naoto standing at the entrance. Nill immediately sprang from her seat across from Heine and nearly tackled the woman in a hug.

It had been a while since Heine had seen her, too. She'd apparently been keeping to herself lately, only visiting the church when there was important business or to visit Nill. He more than often found himself wondering why this was the case, since he had almost gotten used to her shadowing him around the city.

"Hi, Nill. I missed you too." Naoto smiled as she returned the girl's hug. Heine rolled his eyes at the display of affection, purely out of habit.

The dark-haired woman then looked up, and briefly met his gaze. Heine prepared himself for a condescending scowl or quip, but what he got was... nothing. She immediately focused her attention on Granny Liza, ignoring the split-second eye contact completely. Instead, she asked Granny about a new dress.

Heine didn't pay attention to their conversation; he was slightly taken aback by her lack of response to his presence. He remained silent, yet continued to stare at the woman in confusion. What was going on with her lately? More importantly, he suddenly realized, why did he care?

Naoto's visit to the shop continued as normal. Granny forced Heine out the door as she prepared to play dress-up, and he was forced to wait in the cold for them to finish. He contemplated just leaving altogether, maybe to get a cup of coffee or even go home, but (due to laziness, curiosity, or whatever else) ended up staying outside until it was safe to come back in.

When Liza finally invited him back, Heine was again completely ignored by Naoto, despite being asked for his opinion of the dress.

"Yeah, it looks fine." He replied unenthusiastically. He didn't bother even looking at the outfit. His eyes were focused on Naoto's face, waiting for her to look back at him and say something. However, it didn't happen. She continued to avoid his gaze entirely as she thanked Liza for her trouble and made her way to the door.

"Sorry I have to leave so soon. I have... something to take care of." Naoto brushed past him abruptly, and in a moment's notice was out the door.

Granny Liza shook her head and clicked her tongue. "That poor girl... she's pushing herself too hard."

"What do you mean?" Heine asked.

"Really, Heine, didn't you notice? Naoto hasn't slept for days," the little woman responded. "She's going to get sick. I asked her about it, but she insisted she's fine."

Heine frowned at the door, frustrated with the stubborn woman who just exited. He felt a tug on his shirt, and looked down to see Nill with a concerned expression on her face. He knew what that look meant; she wanted him to make sure she was okay. Heine sighed heavily and ran his fingers through his hair.

"You want me to bring her back here?" he said.

Nill nodded. Heine hadn't seen her look so worried in a long time. With another sigh, he tugged his coat tighter and left.

Once on the street, he found Naoto retreating rather quickly, already almost a block away. He had to walk rather fast to catch up to her, feeling foolish as he noticed the stares he was generating from the people walking by. The irony of following /her/ for once was not lost on him.

"Hey," he finally called out as he got close enough. No response. He tried again to get her attention, and was again met with silence. Feeling even more like an idiot for doing this at all, Heine quickened his pace and eventually got close enough to grasp her shoulder.

"HEY!"

Naoto stopped and spun around to look at him point-blank. Her expression was one of both shock and embarrassment. There were heavy dark circles under her eyes. Her cheeks were bright red, and Heine noticed that she was sweating and breathing heavily.

There was a moment of silence before she responded. "What do you want?"

Heine let go of her shoulder, almost relieved that she finally spoke to him. "Nill and Granny are worried about you. They want to make sure you're all right."

"I already told them, I'm fine." Naoto's eyes left his, and she stared guiltily at the concrete.

"You're obviously not," Heine said. "You have a fever, don't you?"

Naoto shifted visibly, giving herself away even more. She didn't say anything.

Heine was amazed that this woman was capable of being so unreasonable. Had this apparent lack of sleep clouded her judgment so badly?

"Nill wants you to come back to the shop." Heine gestured for her to follow him, but she didn't move. She looked back up at him with an expression he couldn't read.

"No... Tell her I'm sorry, but I can't... I need to go home."

Naoto started to back away, but Heine's patience was wearing thin. He abruptly reached forward and grasped her arm. This desperate action came out more forceful than he intended, as he found himself pulling Naoto dangerously close. The force caused the woman to stumble forward and, in her sleep-deprived state, almost fall into him.

Immediately alarm bells went off inside Heine. His perception blurred, and he felt that familiar static begin to cloud his mind. He tried to keep his grip on reality, as the woman tearing apart his sanity was mere inches away. He struggled to push the howling dog back, growling at him to stay the fuck away. He could her it taunting him, begging to be let out to play. _No_, he screamed internally, _not now! _ His vision continued to darken.

"NO!" Naoto suddenly cried out.

Heine felt Naoto's arms on his chest, pushing away from him. At some point he had let go of her, and he realized he was clutching both sides of his head. The static slowly began to fade, and his vision started to clear.

Naoto glanced at him and shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said simply. She quickly turned and walked away from him while he was still semi-paralyzed from their brief contact.

Heine could do nothing but watch her retreating figure in stunned silence. His hands lowered as his vision cleared, and his heartbeat returned to normal. After a few moments of deep contemplation, he turned back the way he came.


End file.
